What are the good habits for personal power and success? Read on…
We all want to be successful in our own way but sometimes we don’t realize that our habits can keep up from achieving success.
Unhelpful habits can sneak up on us. It has been said that we are what we eat, and our eating habits are often unconscious and can stop us from being healthy or from losing that weight that we want to lose.
Being aware of negative habits can make the difference between being successful or drifting through life getting nowhere in particular.
Strong and helpful habits can give us personal power and propel us towards the goals in life we want.
Unhelpful habits that may stop us from doing this are insidious, that is, we don’t notice them – they are part of our life story, the writing on the walls of our life.
What’s our story?
It could be that we have been telling ourselves for years that we are not as good as our brother, sister, friend or whoever. We could be telling ourselves that we are too young or too old, that we’ve left everything too late. Or, it’s not the right time to begin our personal project, that it’s selfish, and so on.
There is no end to these stories, and they can be running our life. They are often at an unconscious level, limiting us, shaping our lives, and stopping us from seizing opportunities, or moving forward.
Of course, we don’t tell ourselves these stories every day at least not consciously, but they run in the background as they always have, pulling us back, holding us down. An unconscious compelling habit that needs to be uncovered and exposed as a habit that is massively and constantly sapping our personal power.
Why do we have these habits and operate under their power?
But first we need to understand why we do this, even unconsciously. We may be quite happy with our lives, and the story we tell ourselves can keep us from having to make any effort to be any better or prevent us from experiencing failure.
By telling ourselves these stories over and over we create our reality which becomes a prison.
How to change a (mostly) unconscious habit that limits your personal power? Change your story!
Sometimes life itself forces us to take stock and to change direction. It may take a shock to jolt us our of our stagnant state.
You reach a certain age, or come to a certain situation, that forces you to confront or experience a new reality. You realize that you need to choose a new way and you see that your old habits have kept you anchored to an unsatisfying life.
Being newly aware of your old habits, created by dysfunctional beliefs helps you to re-evaluate your situation. You see how these habits undermine your personal power, keep you in your old mindset and stop you going forward.
What’s on your bucket list for life that your old habits are stopping you achieving?
It’s amazing how your old story can pin you down in a place that is not entirely unsatisfactory but surrounds you with habits which serve the old story. You drift on in your life in this semi-conscious way. You can’t contemplate going for anything in your bucket list because…
The old story over-rides any exciting opportunities or taking your ambitions to the next level.
Write a bucket list of things you want to do in life or things you want to be.
Do this NOW.
Identify the HABITS that are part of your story and which hold you back.
E.g., Going over past old stuff and living in your regrets.
Personal power comes from cultivating the best habits, so you need to know the difference between good and bad habits.
SOME HABITS WHICH DISEMPOWER YOU – Bring them to your consciousness. Make a life changing decision to change them or leave them behind!
Do you compare yourself unfavorably with others and complain about not having their abilities, looks, or skills?
Do you allow the negative emotions of others influence you and what you want to do? For example, can others make you feel guilty and then you give way to their wishes?
Is it a habit of yours to allow others to breach your boundaries? Are you always saying yes because the story you tell yourself is that you are a “nice” person, and don’t want to be seen as selfish because in your family it was not “nice” to be selfish – even a few times? You now have a story of yourself as a “selfless” person.
Is it a habit of yours to hold grudges, and let them sap your power, giving them more of your attention than they should have?
Is it a habit of yours to forget your own values, and allow the values of others to over-ride yours in a situation?
Is it a habit of yours to go drifting off into your old story, thinking negative and unproductive thoughts instead of getting on with something that would advance your career?
Do you use “poor me” or victim language when describing your situation or life. Are you living in your unfortunate past, if so this is a habit you’ve got into, and a very big power draining one. Being a victim or regularly putting yourself down is a great way of getting out of being responsible for your own actions.
Get out of the habit of believing the old story and the old writing on your walls.
Changing your story, your habits, and regaining your personal power mean adopting effective habits for success.
- Don’t base your self-worth on the opinions of others. It’s only their opinion. Evaluate what they say and if it’s baseless, shut it out and move on.
- If your story has been that you are a person who doesn’t “stand out” then it’s time to change. Embrace being a tall poppy.
- Be kind to yourself and to others, every day.
- Avoid making a habit of being attached to an outcome. Let it go even if it is disappointing to do so.
- Make a habit of being your own person, your authentic self, and not copying others.
- If you have a habit of self-sabotage, putting yourself down, or doubting yourself STOP! This may be part of your old power-sapping story.
- Make a habit of persevering, especially if you have a habit of giving up if the results are not what you want early in your efforts. See that others in your past may have been discouraging or dismissive of your efforts.
- Find your creative side, and don’t let others squash you or your ideas.
- Practice mindfulness, it will help you to notice when the old story starts creeping back, and it will improve your mood and support your personal power.
- Write three things a day that you are grateful for. Keeping a gratitude journal will move your mind towards a more positive outlook.
- Become efficient in your work habits. Avoid wasting time by working in a focused way in 30 – or 60 – minute blocks towards a goal, with a 10 minute rest in between. This will improve your productivity.
- Visualize yourself being your best new powerful self. Do this every day.
- Change your script, and the old writing on your walls, reach into your bucket list and start doing the things you have always wanted to do!
Best wishes.
Kathleen Crawford
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